Take my dad for instance. Now that he is retired he only works 3 hours a day, but because he doesn't have to a dress code, he isn't wasting time every morning deciding to what to wear, and so those 3 hours are really efficient. Plus with a uniform, nobody cares if you spill all over yourself. Everybody knows that a unfiform is just a really big napkin, so those veggie burrito stains just add character and pizzazz.
If i did get to design my own work uniform, it would consist of three items and three items only.
1. Navy blue sweatpants. These are the first item because they’re the most important. When I go home, the first thing I do is put on navy blue sweatpants. You can’t find a more comfortable piece of clothing. The color is great because you can spill all you want and nobody’s the wiser, it just all blends in. All in all, if the uniform doesn’t include navy blue sweatpants, I don’t want the job.
2. Comfy slippers. Right after I change into my navy blue sweatpants, I slide on my sheepskin-lined slippers. Talk about comfort! These little puppies make it feel like you’re walking on a field of soft paralyzed sheep – I say paralyzed only so you don’t picture the sheep as moving. If I could wear slippers to work every day, I’d probably start caring about my job.
3. A headband. All great basketball players were headbands, so isn't it only natural that all great office employees would wear headbands too???
These three items could change the workplace as we know it. I’m serious, America. Just think about how much more productive we would be as a country if all office-workers wore navy blue sweatpants, headbands, and comfy slippers. We’d be a comfortably dressed productivity superpower, and honestly, isn’t that what all this fighting is about anyway?
BALDINGWATCH- Day 20 something
In light of my campaign to keep him out of Congress, Christopher Balding has not updated his blog since June 13th. He probably can't afford to operate his website anymore after his quotes saying he hated children got leaked on this very blog. Plus my Dads $50 campaign donation probably went to an electric shaver after that picture of his got propped up everywhere
Chris claims that he should be elected because of his background in Economics. His supposed breakthrough came when he wrote a report last year about soverign wealth funds, Chris claims that these sovereign wealth funds are much smaller than anyone originally thought
The problem with Chris' report (which you can waste time reading here) is that he fails to take into account any money that these funds farmed out for management to external fund managers. By using data from the US Treasury department (Trust me, they dont have accurate records, I would know) he only captures money's that are within the fund, not any money that has been outsourced to banks, or fund managers. Given that fact that funds the size of these soveign wealth funds traditionally have over half their value being managed by outside fund managers, its obvious that the treasury data doesn't show the whole picture. So of course the Treasury data won't match up with what these funds report, because the data shows less than 50% of what these funds actually control! Therefore any claim Chris makes about these funds overreporting their assets is baseless because it relies on totally irrelevent and incomplete data.
I give Chris an A+ effort for trying on his paper, (after all he did writeover 100 pages!), but if he wants a seat at the big boy table, he will have write a paper that takes at least 2 paragraphs to disprove, not just 1.
