Justin finally moved out today and its so sad, I cry myself to sleep thinking about him........
FALSE, I do not miss him. Moving on,
Fall is just around the corner and you know what that means: Crab Apple Season. I’m getting hungry just thinking about them. These little buggers pop up all over the place and nobody wants them because people are idiots. As a result, they’re absolutely free, which is my favorite price of all.
Anyway, farmers usually get mad when I help myself to their apples but when I’m picking up crab apples, I’m a real American hero to them. Plus, crab apples are useful in all situations. You can use them in jelly or applesauce or one time I cut myself real bad trying to get over some razor wire. Took out a crab apple, sliced it in half, rubbed it on my wounds and a few minutes later I was better than new.
I can’t think of anything else in my life that I look forward to more than Crab Apple Season. If you’re looking for a free nutritious food that’s available without dealing with the jerks at the grocery store, you really can’t beat crab apples. Stay away from Eugene though, because those crabbies belong to me.
Side Note: Crab apples have nothing to do with real crabs. I don’t want to get into some kind of lawsuit because you made an idiotic assumption, so I’m setting the record straight right now. Crab apples contain no actual crabmeat. There you go.
